The Big Raise

I have to apologize.... if you happen to have been in my neighborhood this afternoon. You might have (insert nervous and embarrassing laugh here) heard some shouting from my house. From my garage specifically. No, nothing bad was happening. I was home alone. Something good was happening.... it was bike test day.

My day didn't start off so great. I do believe I own the stupidest reason for missing a swim practice this morning. In all my life I have never had such a bad one.And as you might have guessed, it has to do with LOST.

Well wouldn't you know.... I dreamt about LOST last night. And I dreamt I was a character. You see Hurley has a very strange connection with numbers on the hatch that Locke found, and the mysterious French woman knew those numbers too.... and Hurley played those numbers in the lotto 1 year ago, won millions and has been cursed ever since. So in my dream I was sitting at the fire on the island with Hurley, being the only one who knew what had happened, because I had watched the show.....

I remember the alarm going off, and I remember being in the jungle. I remember hearing the wind absolutely howling. I remember Hurley asking me if I was going to venture out in that weather alone.

"Dude." He said to me "I wouldn't be heading out in that wind with that creature out there." And I remember thinking he was right. I should stay put and wait for Jack, or Kate, Sawyer or better yet Mr. Locke, I would be best accompanied by them.

Best accompanied by them down 15A to MCC to SWIM??????

I woke up again at 7:20 very confused.

It's time to take a night off of LOST. Well, maybe one episode.

It's certainly not how I like to begin the day. Luckily enough I can make that swim up, and it was time to pack up and move on. I reoriented myself to the real world and spent 3 hours in 110 degree heat, teaching for the better part of the morning.

Finally 1pm and my bike test arrived. I never get nervous, I get psyched. I wanted the chance to redeem myself from last month's test... in which the data had been lost.

So today was the day and it started off in utter disaster. headache, stomach ace, feeling really crappy. When I finally hit the 20 minute time trial I was searching for reasons to quit. But I found one good reason to go.

I had my time goals written on the mirror in front of me. I stared at them and then I began. It wasn't easy. It sure wasn't easy. I thought back to Elizabeth's great post about pain and I began to eat the pain. I embraced it, sucked it in and thrived on it.

And I might.... might have been heard shouting out loud EAT THE PAIN MARY! EAT IT! And again I remind you that is a might.

Because I was in such a zone that I wasn't sure if it was out loud or in my head. It was so crystal clear and loud that I couldn't tell the difference.

When it was done I cheered. And then got nervous. Would the same fate await this test? Would the download fail and my results be lost forever? Not so much. They downloaded with ease and as I studied them I smiled. I am up 11 watts since my last test in August, between IMLP and IMFL.

I earned myself a raise. I smiled.

But all the watts on earth won't do me any good unless I can run off of them. And won't do me any good unless I can swim before them. So as exciting as they may be, I have to remain in perspective. I have had the fastest bike split at billions of races. I've biked as fast as the pro women thousands of times.

But I have never run with them. Not yet anyways.

So in the beginning of January, when not only is it ass cold but now 60 degrees and then tomorrow 30..... when I trade running skirt for tights on a daily basis, this is only a test. Tests are only as good as what you do with them. We'll be using this one. And building upon this one.

As I said before I am leaving nothing behind this season. I've left myself all over the place in 05 and 06, and enough is enough.

So please forgive me if you heard any screaming. No need to dial 911 for a domestic violence report. And nothing at all was wrong. It was just me, a girl and her bike, riding away in the sunset.