instinct

My father always taught me to trust myself, my instinct, my gut. Yesterday it once again proved to be true as I sat and listened to someone use the misfortune of my summer poor health to try to manipulate me and circumstances.

I am so glad that I can trust my gut. He was right, my father was always right. And I swear that if you tune in close enough, you can spot a liar a mile away.

Because I spotted one that was much too close to home.

I often wonder why as humans we do that to one another? What happened to authenticity? While I am no perfect human being by any means at least I can look in the mirror and understand that when I make a mistake..... I make it authentically. I may overreact. I may say the wrong thing.

But I will never use someone else's pain to try to set my own self free.

What is authenticity? Seth Godin has a really great blog and I think he sums it up best in the following few paragraphs:

If it acts like a duck (all the time), it's a duck. Doesn't matter if the duck thinks it's a dog, it's still a duck as far as the rest of us are concerned.

Authenticity, for me, is doing what you promise, not "being who you are".That's because 'being' is too amorphous and we are notoriously bad at judging that. Internal vision is always blurry.

Doing, on the other hand, is an act that can be seen by all.

As the Internet and a connected culture places a higher premium on authenticity (because if you're inconsistent, you're going to get caught) it's easy to confuse authentic behavior with an existential crisis. Are you really good enough, kind enough, generous enough and brave enough to be authentically a hero or leader?

Mother Theresa was an atheist, filled with self doubt. But she was an authentic saint, because she always acted like one.

You could spend your time wondering if what you say you are is really you. Or you could just act like that all the time. That's good enough, thanks. Save the angst for later.

It brings me back to the four rules I repeat to myself every morning when I meditate and several times throughout the day:

1. Be Impeccable with your word.

2. Don't take anything personally.

3. Don't make assumptions

4. Always do your best.

I promise.... you do your best to live by these four rules, and your life will get much simpler, really quick.

As I continue to trust my gut and follow those four agreements I see it seeping into each area of my life like water seeps through cracks in a wall, except as it seeps into me it is very good. It grounds me, it keeps me honest, keeps me in touch and at the same time in tune.

It's not about standing on a high horse and screaming I am perfect..... but I am able to live free of the mental drama.

So as I sat there yesterday and listened to a magnificent story, I realized it was not designed necessarily to harm me..... to but to preserve the self of the teller. But I found incredible comfort in knowing, feeling and believing that my own gut instinct was right all along.

So is yours.