Instinct

GOOD LUCK BREE AT IRONMAN CANADA! KICK BUTT AND GET THAT SPOT TO KONA! TO HOME!

I have to answer a question I was asked several times yesterday..... is it really this great to be a Mom?????

Yes it is. There are hard days. Especially with a kid with "special needs." In the grand scheme of things, our special needs aren't as big as many other people. Those amazing parents who take care of kids with brain injuries and cancer and all of the horrible stuff children have to go through. They are the ones with the struggle. Those are the ones with real special needs. Kids in wheelchairs needing ramps in their homes. Needing rooms made bigger to accommodate ventilators.

Believe me I have it incredibly easy. My hardships as a mom are what people with real hardships look at and wish for.

Maybe it was because Luc didn't come to us the easy way. Maybe because we have been unable to give him a sibling. You don't want to know how many times I have been pregnant. I have days when I get upset and frustrated, just like everyone else.

But every single night I watch him sleep and I thank God for him. He's a gift.

I think people sometimes wait for "the right time" to have children. There is no magical moment when you say "I am ready". And when you take home your new bundle of joy..... realize you get a bigger instruction manual for your TV than you do for your child. It will be a good luck! And off you go.

Parenting is the biggest stumbling act there is. You learn by guessing. You learn by falling on your face. All of the baby books and what to expect books in the world can't teach you what you learn.

They are all a bunch of bullshit as far as I am concerned. For one simple reason.....

Individuality. No child in the world is a clone. No child in the world is a textbook case. YOU DON'T WANT THEM TO BE. YOU WANT THEM TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL. My best parenting advice? Trust your instinct..... your instinct is never wrong.

Instinct is something very powerful. Something we are all born with. At age 7 it is untouched. Then someone says something that causes you doubt, which then becomes a layer on top of your instinct. Through the years there are more layers until you are an adult and don't trust yourself at all.

When I race on instinct.... I have great races. When I race from my head.... when I think too much.... when I allow the mental hamster wheel to turn..... when I try to think my way out of the paper bag..... the box of hurt..... call it what you will...... I more often than that fail.

Come out of your head. Unplug form your mind and tune into what brought you to the first starting line ever.... in the first place. That flutter in your heart. That feeling of "ohmygodican'tbelieveiamgonnadothis!".... and it is a feeling..... not a thought.

When those moments of frustration start to pop up, those times where you start to seep back into your head and you start to think..... I can't, I am tired, this is ridiculous..... look at those moments as moments of opportunity.

Resistance is opportunity in disguise. Come to the moment of greatest resistance, throw your heart right over it and I promise you body will follow you. Your mind.... it might trail last. It might get dragged through the dirt but it will finally come along.

But your thoughts and your plans and your calculations are not what brought you there in the first place.

It was your heart.

Sport again becomes a great metaphor for life.

You have the idea of what parenting will be like. What the baby will be like. What your child will be like. How the schedule will flow. How you will handle the late nights, the diapers, the breastfeeding that doesn't happen the way you want it to.

You think you should do things one way and you bust your ass trying to stick with that plan.

Your heart says.... hey this isn't working..... there are better ways..... listen to that voice instead.

Your mind too often says failure.

Your heart never will if you are doing what you really love. Be it parenting, sport, hell driving the damn car.

You have absolutely everything you need, inside of you at this very moment. It does not need to be developed, trained harder or even rested. It just needs to be uncovered. Layer by layer allow the shit to fall away, and you will see.

That everything you could ever possibly need is not set in a goal or a title or a time......

it already exists...... right inside of you. So stop looking outside for it. And come back to what's authentic and what's real.

Your instinct. Trust it.