pre race thoughts

It's 4am here in Clearwater and I have been up for about 10 minutes. It's so strange to be in this hotel by myself. I have 2 beds, a kitchenette, bathroom and living room to myself. All for about 60 per night. My poor friends over at the Hilton (about 2 feet away) paid 215 a night.

It's quiet in here. Im used to needing the full hour to get ready. Nope. All I have to do this am is throw on my clothes and go to the race. I might have to consider this "my own room" thing in the future. (disclaimer: for those coming to Longhorn I will still make the hotel arrangements but I won't be even looking until after Dec 5th so please don't freak out),

I think part of my relaxed attitude is the 12 years I have been at this. I have literally been there and done that. I am not looking to make a mark, but looking to make my way back. And then some. What I realize is that this is a stepping stone to what we are going to do in 10. Coach said I have made a lot of sacrifices in the last 6 months. I hate when he says that. I committed to this. A sacrifice is donating a kidney. This isn't a sacrifice, this is a privilege. We are really just a bunch of yuppies running around.

You can come to a race like this.... a world championships and get caught up in the hype. Everyone here is fast. Everyone here looks fit. Some of the girls yesterday were really nervous, like their mortgage depended on how they did in this race. I just don't understand what there is to be nervous about, unless you let yourself get nervous about the uncontrollable. Flats, dropping things, a swim course we are not sure of. You give that stuff your energy and what do you race with? How do you even enjoy it? You can't compare yourself to others here. I have an extremely different body than most. I don't worry about it. I perform well in my body, they perform well in theirs.

I have a plan for those uncontrollables. I flat.... I fix it. I drop something...... I keep going. It's about dealing with whatever crops up. Just like we do in life. I am not one to lie awake in bed and worry about things. Last time I checked .... worrying solved nothing. Action solves things. So rest and gather the energy needed to get out and do.

When you come to this race checking in your bike is a process. It's different from Placid. You wait in line at bike check in until a volunteer is available to escort you to your rack. The they escort you through the tents and to the bag drop off. I chatted with my volunteer and thanked her for being there. She told me I was her first age grouper. She had only checked in the pros and they were cocky. I smiled. Man, these guys have to get a clue.

The run from the swim exit to the bikes is long. Maybe longer than Placid. Then we run through the gear bags, which are all on the ground rather than on hooks. I have a good spot and no athletes are allowed access to gear bags this morning. I am glad because put a bunch of athletes kicking bags around and mayhem occurs, We have access to bikes only. So if you see a long T1 time that's why. We go through gear bags and then into the tents. All I have in the bag is a helmet, sunglasses and a race belt. Shoes are on the bike, which was allowed.

Run bag, just shoes, gels and Garmin. No hat this time. I bought a visor and it's too tight. I have been racing sans hat or visor and it works great. I wonder how many people will stop and wait for their Garmin to "locate" in T2. I just turn it on and press start. It will catch up.

I like my pacing goals and wattage's. I think we finally have nailed the wattage.

Well, it's time to go team, Thanks for "listening" to my pre race thoughts. Thanks for watching on ironman dot com (just a 70.3). It seems they will send us off by numbers. I am listed first in the program with a 1049 because I qualified first. Waaaaaaayyyyyyyy back in October of 08.

A lifetime ago, eh? I remember looking over at Kim at Austin 70.3 nervous that I wouldn't get this spot. After what I had been through that summer getting to this starting line seemed almost impossible. Hell getting to that finish line almost didn't happen.

But we did it, didn't we?

Thank you guys so much. I cant convey the gratitude that I feel right now. It's time to go have some fun. Today I get to swim in the ocean, bike and run in the sun. With 1700 of my closest friends.

See you on the other side.