Last night I got to do a race! A running race! With Sarah and 10,000 other people! Yes the Rochester Chase Corporate Challenge was as much fun as I had hoped it to be.
As a Pediatric Emergency Nurse at the University Of Rochester Medical Center I was honored to run for the giant U of R team, and many of those teammates included those I work with. The Pediatric ED was well represented, in fact the whole U of R was. Traditionally the Pediatric part of the hospital… correctly called the Golisano Children's Hospital at Strong (too many names … I know) would run as a separate team since we are considered to be a separate hospital. This year however we got swallowed up by the entire University… but that's okay with me.
The top six men and women from the U of R get chosen to be on teams, men's, women's and mixed. They all get flown to NYC to run in the National Corporate Challenge. I was informed a week before the race that while I'd likely make the team… I could not be on the team because runners have to work 25 hours per week.
I work 20. SIGH!
Traveling to NYC for a 25 minute run…. that's a little silly. I need a good 60 minute swim and 6 hour bike to warm up!!!!!
Wednesday kept me resting with a GI illness while Thursday brought GI happiness and a 2 hour ride in the morning. The sun was shining! Glory!
Since RIT is just 5 miles form my house… I rode my mountain bike over. Parking 10,000 runners is a mess, besides I need a little bike before a little run, right? Besides the 2 hour ride from the morning was already gone, can't consider that a warm up!
The best part of it was that Sarah was there (Adam too, but he doesn't run in a skirt!) and we planned on a good strong run. We've spent many good hard runs together the past few months and this would be no different. But at about 25 minutes it'd be entirely too short. We joked the night before that come the finish line we'd keep going!
"Don't mind those 2 nutballs! They think this is an Ironman!" I am sure they'd say.
The weather was great. 70 degrees and sunny. Place 10,000 people on a 2 lane 3.5 mile road and you will even heat it up 10 more degrees. Somehow I lost Sarah at the start but I found Kevin Walter. He didn't have a cup of Starbucks in his hand and I was amazed!
It was a great run! It was a lot of fun and I was really pleased with my time. Faster than Tempo Paced. I laughed because the 200 guys who bolted past me and my skirt during mile 1 were repassed by this skirt on mile 2.
I was impressed at how many good runners who were there who didn't officially consider themselves to be runners. I was impressed with all of the walkers and the volunteers!
I was so proud of my Pediatric ED team and the whole U of R team. 317 Strong and I believe we WON!
I even got to hang out with Carl Johnston for a bit who made me pinky swear this was my final Ironman (for a bit), and who never believes that I have any fun. He promised me he would show me some fun on the bike next year and I told him how much fun I was having becoming a runner.
And by the way I did make the team…. unofficially. WOO HOO!
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Last night I got to do a race! A running race! With Sarah and 10,000 other people! Yes the Rochester Chase Corporate Challenge was as much fun as I had hoped it to be.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
I need to tell you about one of my athletes. His name is Ed. He is the author of "Ring The Bolus" which is his blog. Ed is an amazing athlete. A college football player. At age 27 he was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes. Type I Diabetes... not Type II. Type I.... insulin dependant diabetes. Yes, it is rare for someone to be diagnosed as an adult.
My brother is a Type I Diabetic. He was diagnosed at age 7. As a Pediatric Nurse I encounter many children who are diagnosed.
I met Ed on the out and back of Ironman Lake Placid 2007. He was with some friends, volunteering. He handed me water. I knew his friend but I did not know him. I saw him again at mile 21.
The next morning we met in line at sign up. Both in our camping chairs, me sore and dead from the Ironman. Ed... eyes wide open as he was dying to take this challenge on.
We spoke on the phone that week and I am honored that he hired me to be his coach. I coach another Type I diabetic and she's phenomenal. She's had diabetes since childhood and she manages it better than anyone in the world.
Coaching an athlete through an Ironman is one thing.... coaching a Type I Diabetic is a whole other ball of marbles. Blood sugars are our friend and at the same time our enemy. Ed was so proactive, hooking himself up with the experts in the field. There are a small number of Type I Diabetics who have completed the Ironman.... and within that same group a good number of endurance athletes.
Essentially for Ed it's been trial and error. Balancing blood sugars, blood testing, and insulin while balancing training and building volume. Seems that each week we had some sort of an issue related to something, but we got through it. Ed figured so many things out and I only hop I have been enough support for him.
This weekend was the first time he met the rest of the team. My instruction to my team was that they were to wait for no one unless it was Ed..... they knew Ed's story and they took him in. He roomed with Bill and Adam. Bill is a talented and brainy ICU nurse who also understands the workings of this disease. So he was able to help Ed with some things.
As the onlooker the three acted like a couple of brothers to be honest.
Saturday night Ed sat in my room and we recounted the debacle of the blood sugar that had begun on Friday. While he didn't get the entire 112 in he got a damn good chunk in on a dangerously low blood sugar.
I swear to god Ed could be at zero with blood pouring out of his eyes and he would still finish this.
We talked about how we are going to structure taper for Mooseman and IMLP and how we will need to plan blood sugar testing around that. You see, planning for a big workout requires three days of preparation. Now when we are tapering that can throw things off as we suddenly drop volume and try to aim for a pre race start blood sugar of over 200.
In true Ed fashion he nailed his blood sugar on Sunday morning for the long run. He even swam in Mirror Lake at 50 degrees. And on Monday he stayed behind and ride the 2 loops AGAIN. Successfully. And ALONE.
There's something about this character named Ed. Embracing the lifestyle of triathlon, the mentality of the Ironman, dropping that bag of shit and figuring things out. I have seen athletes just refuse to figure things out.... they could take a lesson from Ed.
Want a definition of HTFU? It's Ed.
So here's to you Ed...... may we balance the blood sugars perfectly at Mooseman and Ironman lake Placid. May you achieve your dream of being one of the very few people in the world with Type I diabetes to complete the Ironman..... and for the record I absolutely dread you going to Graduate School and moving to Virginia. You're part of us man!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 4:17 PM
Posted by Mary Eggers at 12:46 PM
Posted by Mary Eggers at 4:16 AM
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Kevin Walter is the human Starbucks Store Locator. Not shown is wife Ellie "Sherpa" who is getting him his coffee!
Day two am.... drinking coffee and getting ready! Amy Mo and Amy N, bookended by Ed and Bill!
Getting ready to ride!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 8:29 AM
Monday, May 26, 2008
Our annual Weekend at Placid Training Camp was a success.... full report and pictures to come but here are the highlights:
* everyone did GREAT
* I am so proud of Nathalie.... she changed her first tubular!
* Sarah tried to convince me that a marathon between 2 Ironmans was a great idea..... but did not succeed
* Kim was wishing she stayed at the Mariott and dressed for winter all weekend. She even ate with her gloves on.
* A new fuzzy cycling jersey mid ride is GOLD
* so is a Snickers Bar. And then another.
* Seeing the wizard, being pulled into the box of hurt and then the seven corners of hell complete with pitt bull, pickup truck and semi truck is my sick way of having fun.
* Bill might believe that I am now actually a screen and the wind blows through me.
* Nathalie is the best roommate EVER.
* Marit I got a French Press for you and I LOVE IT.
* Ed might be the new definition of HTFU. Complete with Giants Cap.
* Travis and Joey and uniquely talented at Boche Ball
* Ben and Jerry's..... enough said.
* I trained 27.55 hours this week and the .55 is the key.
* I ate Bill's extra meatballs, Chris' leftover bacon, Nathalie's Toast and a paper napkin.
* This team has an addiction and it is called Sarbucks.
*Kevin Walter will travel to the ends of the earth if it entails a Starbucks.
* Kevin Walter can also change three flats and still negative split the bike
* Ellie Walter was the smart one this weekend, after a day at the spa she looked much better than I did. But she looks better than I do on a dialy basis.
* Dennis gave up his woobie and I think he's secretly dieting.
*Amy Mo's Sherpa called us the freak show and wondered which was worse.... being a drug addict or a triathlete?
* He threatened to wake us up at 4:30am and realized we'd already be awake.
* Amy N. is a Nero psychologist sent here by my husband and I am sure of it. Her cover is that she's in law school.
* Sarah Nathalie and I can fit into a 2 seater car.
* My car is now called the locker room.
It was a great weekend. Much more to come!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:25 AM
Friday, May 23, 2008
Posted by Mary Eggers at 10:19 AM
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
"Five three hundreds." Coach Lorie instructed us the other morning. And then she set the interval. Doable, I thought, with a little reach. This morning I was swimming in a Grimm Sandwich. Erik in front of me and Heidi behind. I waved Heidi ahead, she was preparing for the Madrid World Cup and needed a little push.
Erik will typically lap me at 250 yards and today was no different. Except that I finally got sick of it.
A month ago Coach Lorie videotaped us swimming above and underwater. A DVD was then created of the whole team. I was horrified as I watched myself. I was a shadow of the swimmer I grew up as. I really never kicked. Never. Not once not even a blip.
As we headed into set #2 of those 5 X 300's I thought, this is it. I am sick of getting dropped. I am a swimmer damnit!
I began #2 on Grimm's feet. And that's where I stayed for the next four. I added my kick. I felt like the college swimmer i used to be. I felt my heart swell, I felt myself reach for something more. Contentment had taken over me in this lane and I hadn't made the reach in ages.
"What was that?" cried Dr. Les when we were done. "That's the best I have seen you swim in five years!"
""I decided to finally buck up and swim." I told him. I was smiling, my lane mates were proud. Through the next sets I did it again. And again.
Then this morning I did it again through 4,000 yards. It was not easy. I started to fall back but I kept trying.
When on earth did I stop trying?
When did I stop believing?
When did I get comfortable being last in the lane?
When did I stop reaching?
That all stopped this week. I dropped it. It's part of dropping that bag of shit I talk so much about. I just didn't realize this was in that bag. And it isn't anymore.
How often in our lives do we create those habits? We get comfortable with where we are. At the top, at the bottom, somewhere in the middle. We come back to that same habit. Over and over and over.
Well what if we began to create a new habit????
What if instead of avoiding the final hill we took it? What if instead of finishing ..... we finished big. What if we finished each workout with our hands in the air declaring victory?
You see what happens to the people who get stuck. They do the same thing day after day year after year. It's hard for them to stray. They wonder why they always end up in the same place. They try to move ahead but their old habits bring them back.
Don;t let that be you. Hell it almost became me. Look higher, reach further, dream bigger. Why not. We won't ever know how far we can go unless we risk going a little bit further.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:58 PM
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
My Coach posted this over on our forum.... ( come on over and join us no matter where you are from) which I think is brilliant advice!
OK Ironman season is here again. Here are five things I see that people do during the week leading up to an ironman that potentially sabotages their chances for a good race. A lot of the examples are from Lake Placid but they apply to all races. They’re in no particular order and I’m sure there’s a lot more that I missed. Feel free to add or debunk.
Too Much Swimming
Ok it’s ironman week. You’re in Lake Placid four or five days before the race with really nothing to do but taper. So what do you do? Swim a lot. You go down and swim one lap (2000 meters) of the course every morning. If you’re there five days before that’s around 8K meters plus the 4K for the race which makes it 12K meters for the week. For most age group triathletes that’s their biggest swim week of the year! You have to taper the swim as well.
Treating it like a Family Vacation
I know you have used up lots of emotional capital with the spouse and kids in your lead up to the big race. So you try to make the “down” time spent in town before the race more of a family vacation. You walk up and down Main Street shopping all day in 85 degree heat. You climb up Whiteface Mountain or the ski jumps. Spend too much time at the athlete’s expo shopping. Coupled with the 8-10K of swimming you’re pretty much spent by the time race day comes around. The best thing to do before race day, when you’re not eating or doing a workout, is to sit at the hotel/condo with your feet up (even better lying down). Show up as close to race day as possible and promise the spouse and kids that the vacation will start after the race. You might be a little sore, but. You won’t be as stressed. You’ll be able to eat and do anything, which will allow you to truly enjoy the family vacation.
Not Putting on New Tires
$500 Registration, $5000 bike, $2000 wheels, $2500 for lodging but you’re going to race on tires you have raced on for the last one or two years? Ok I don’t have the stats for this one. It might just be my own silly superstition. But why not mount some new tires during race week. Ride them a couple of times to ensure there aren’t any problems. Race day flat insurance.
Listening to Race Week Experts
It doesn’t matter what your expected finishing time is going to be. It will seem that everyone you to talk during race week is planning to finish several hours ahead of you. They’ll have great advice and opinions on pacing, nutrition and equipment. You will be tempted based on this advice to tweak your race day plan. The race plan that you have been perfecting (hopefully) for the better part of ever. Don’t do it! The fact of the matter is most people are winging it on race day. Don’t change your race strategy based on a conversation you had with a person while wading into Mirror Lake for your 2K swim.
Forgetting to Have Fun
The winners are only going to get $10K for 26 weeks of training. You can make that on unemployment. Relax.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 10:41 AM
Saturday, May 17, 2008
The Weekend at Placid originated way back in 2003 and we've been going every year since. The name comes from that movie … remember "Weekend at Bernie's?" that's where the name came from.
It was 2003 and my friends and I were doing the Tour of the Ohio Valley Southern River (TOSRV). It was a 200 mile ride. 100 miles from Columbus to Portsmouth Ohio…..sleep overnight on a gym floor and then ride 100 miles back. The weather was warm but hell it was rainy. And windy.
At one point Kara screamed out that there were tornadoes and we believed her. Until we realized they were smokestacks.
My dear friend Ellie Hershberg was in her residency at the time. At the same hospital I am a nurse at. In fact many nights we worked together, and rode long after 2 hours of sleep.
On this ride we reminisced about old movies. Weekend at Bernie's was a favorite of the group.
You know how when you are riding 200 miles, a little tired, depleted… you know how things are really, really funny? Things you'd snort at if you were in your normal life?
Well I had the brainchild idea to call the weekend we'd soon be spending in Lake Placid…. Weekend at Placid…… and we'd all be the dead guy. At the time… I swear…. every single person was rolling around on a gym floor laughing.
Uh…. yeah…. so that's how the name came about. We've been heading up to Placid ever since.
For me Lake Placid is a place that is all about wellness. Goodness and wellness. A town where not so many people are walking around on their Black Berries. Where people are spending time together. Where there are road signs that signify cyclists on the roads and please drivers… please respect them.
This is the place where the Olympic hopefuls train. The skiers. The Luger's. The skaters. Everyone. There are kids, there are teenagers and there are adults following their athletic hearts. Following their dreams.
And we are no different.
The mountains are beautiful; the course we ride is lined with rivers. The trees are greener than anywhere else. We get to spend three days with each other, training, laughing and learning a lot about ourselves.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 5:34 AM
Thursday, May 15, 2008
And Amy Kloner has no blog........ WTF??? What I can say about her is that each conversation I had with her.... she speaks in a voice that is highly excited and a step above talking and a step below screaming.... even when she's giving a post race interview from a wheelchair! I might be the same if I won the race to though..... and for the record remember that picture of her on the cover of USA Triathlon with "the helmet" .... it looks much better on her in person.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 8:04 AM
Monday, May 12, 2008
So that was me. And ironically that's what I got called all day long on the course here at the Gulf Coast 1/2 Ironman. I had a ton of fun. I felt so lucky to even be on the starting line.
I rate this race as a B+ for me. Not my best time but we are getting there. This was a B priority race for me (some people wonder why people have B races…. why travel so far for a B race…. do you know my camp HTFU sisters? That's why). The goals were pacing pacing pacing. I am also not strong on flat hot courses. So putting myself right on the sun was the idea. Last year was not a great experience for me, and this year went a bit better!
The swim went fine. I felt great and it was fun. Knowing the physics of surfing helped me time my strokes and breathing with the great waves we were so lucky to have!
Onto the bike I was feeling very good. I had to stop in the beginning because I dropped my nutrition, a little bumpy road and a forgetful athlete, need to make sure those cages are secure. I met up with a fellow Splsih suit wearer and when I had to stop the second time, to secure my front cage…. she screamed at me "No Stopping EGGERS!". It was nice to make a friend out there. I rode pretty much alone; the only woman who passed me was Atlanta's Amy Kloner, eventual winner and pro duathlete!!! (might want to think of that triathlon pro card Amy!) We've emailed a lot but never met face to face. She introduced herself and for a minute I thought I would hang with her.
Pacing goals, I reminded myself, hung my head and stayed back. I rode a bit beneath my wattage goals, and I felt great. Nutrition was spot on. The wind was fair. The air was hot and for now the sun was hiding. The fog signaled to me humidity was present.
Onto the run things felt good and hot. I had to hold myself back the first 4 miles and then…. my Garmin battery died. Oh well, I thought, I will have to run this on feel. I didn't even have a watch with me.
I took so much salt during this whole race that I was feeling very confident in my electrolyte status. I hit coke at each aid station. I kept cool. I felt that I was on pace. After the race I realzied the pace I had found was my Ironman Pace. Good news for IMLP. I felt excited about that. If all fails me at IMLP I can find the pace.
I didn't quite feel like I would be able to run harder at mile 10. I felt a bit foggy, which was strange. At eighty six degrees it may have been hotter than this New Yorker was ready for.
The entire time I was waiting for Ashley to pass me on the run. She's a much stronger runner than I am and I had calculated she would catch me at least by mile 10. When I didn't see her I felt worried. Little id I know she was pushing through some really tough nutritional issues. I have been there, it's not fun. Part of me wanted to turn around and wait for her. She'd have killed me if I did that. I prayed that she was okay and that I would see her soon.
Exactly at mile 10 someone turned on the sun. I walked 2 aid stations to get cool. I took more salt. My muscles felt fine, my head just felt foggy.
I crossed the line 10 minutes faster than 2006. But well off my PR. We knew that coming into this, Lake Placid is the prize. I will admit to initially being disappointed by that.
Then I remembered a few things. How lucky I am. To arrive at a staring line, to be healthy enough to compete, to have the people in my life that I have.
I thought about Marit. She stood on the sidelines all day long. She's been Sherpa-ing us around all weekend. Marit would take my "not a personal best time" in a heartbeat. She'd be doing anything right now to be on that race course.
A man drowned in the swim today. The story is not clear now but someone started this race who did not live to see the finish.
Puts things into perspective, eh?
So I will take it. I know my better times are coming later. I know my day is coming. I know I am getting closer. I know I just have to believe.
I felt happy all day long. I felt in control and I dealt with the heat as best I could. As a test of fitness I think we did pretty well. The coming month is going to be hard. I am ready, I am willing and I told Coach T to lay it on me!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 8:17 PM
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Happy Mother's Day to me! In the Atlanta airport eating a parfait, and at least I have Starbucks.
This afternoon I paid two hundred and thirty dollars to fly my bike. TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY DOLLARS.
The gate agent said the price and not only did I throw up in my mouth, but I shat myself as well.
"New regulations." She said.
"Since Thursday?" I asked. "I paid $80 to fly it down!" And was told that the gate agent in Rochester "did it wrong." I ask her to explain to me how on earth this costs $230 to fly. IS there a dollar amount per inch? Per pound? I know the rules, I am an athlete who flies with her bike quite a bit!
I politely ask to speak with the manager. He tells me the rules and the rules and that I need to take it up with customer service.... honey. I sigh and hand them my card. Of which they tell me they can not accept because they can't quite clearly read my name on the back. And my business name is on the front.
"We don't know it's yours." The manager tells me.
"I own the business." I laugh. "Founder.... President..... CEO...."
"Sorry." He says "My agent won't be accepting that!"
Am I on some show, where Marit will be running around the corner with a TV camera laughing? Now would be the time for that to happen.
"There's an ATM around the corner honey." He instructs me.
I walk around the corner ready to withdraw TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY DOLLARS in AMERICAN money might I add.... to fly by bicycle. And then I see it.
OUT OF ORDER.
I sigh. I walk back to the counter. I tell them it's out of order. All three gate agents shrug. They rudely tell me I can take a cab to the nearest ATM machine..... 3 miles away.
Oh my god. Marit... Ashley.... are you here with cameras???????
I dial my husband.... who doesn't answer.
I dial my parents.... who don't answer.
I start dialing friends..... finally one answers. God love him he gives the gate agent his credit card number over the phone..... because did I mention they would not accept the card from my non business account because they could not see my name clearly enough either? And when I asked if we could call the 1-800 number.... or I could pull up the account on my laptop..... no sorry honey, that just won't do.
My ever so amazing friend gives them his credit card number over the phone. They take it, and I am so grateful to him! I ask them why on earth they can accept a credit card over the phone (for a fee that is so up the ass it's not even funny!) and can't accept TWO cards I have in front of them.
"Policy honey." I am told. Did I acquire a new boyfriend? Am I going steady with this man? Is there a reason he seems to think my name is honey?
This is all code word for: we are gate agents who don't have a brain cell to think from, so we just blindly follow rules we don't understand.
Once in Atlanta... where I am now..... I walk to the customer service desk. They repeat the same schpeel. Hey gate agent in Rochester..... look out.... Delta keeps calling you an idiot!
But they ask me to put into writing what has happened. That in 30 days they will refund whatever they deem appropriate.
How about next time I buy the damn ticket for my bike and it gets to fly with me? because if I am going to pay more than my ticket to fly my bike then it gets to sit next to me instead of get manhandled by your baggage people who like to break my freaking bike box!!!!!!!
Hell I have been wearing the same clothes for four days so that the only thing I have to check is the bike box!
As I left my bike in the hands of the gate agents in Panama City Beach I warned them.... not only had my bike better arrive... it'd better arrive without any damage. (I imagine they were just shaking in their boots... uh... yeah).
I shall keep you updated. I will not be taken advantage of like this. This is robbery. Rules one day don't matter the next.... people who can't seem to agree on anything.... and people who follow policy to follow policy.... I don't think so!
Happy Mother's Day to ME!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 7:19 PM
It's our last day on the beach. I shall post a race report tomorrow, as I am still reviewing. The most significant thing that happened to me.... my Garmin battery died on the run. I was aiming for my "M pace". And I didn't wear a watch. I thought, oh good... an opportunity to see if I can find M pace by feel.
I didn't, I held E pace by feel. For the Ironman that's a good thing, and that's the ultimate goal.
Last year I came to this race alone. This year I got to share it with friends.
Last night we had a picnic on the beach and it was awesome. I feel so blessed and grateful to have made these friends. Which also makes me grateful that I have made friends with all of you. I just know that if all of you were here we'd be having the time of our lives.
It's neat how we found one another. People will ask the three of us how we met and we'll say "Blogging.". In one way it makes us feel like Internet stalkers and on the other hand I am really really happy.
Where else would I watch Ashley reuse a coffee mug that she barely rinsed to heat up water for oatmeal?
Who else would I take a half chewed NUUN tablet from and throw it in my own water bottle, but from Marit?
These moments are the moments that memories are made. And I am so very grateful to have shared them with Marit and Ashley!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 6:00 AM
Saturday, May 10, 2008
I tried to pay Ashley $100 to wear and eye patch and run up to Spencer Smith... and jump around like an obsessed fan... cuz she does have her Planet X Wheels!. but she looked at me and said.... Hell NO!
Skank-o-meter diarrhea Ashley Long finishing the Gulf Coast 1/2 Ironman!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 4:59 PM
WE FINISHED...... we got IV's and we had pretty good days. They don't call this Gulf "ROAST for a reason. Full report is on the way....... know that we are pretty psyched and the next 24 hours I will be in the Cheetah Suit. More to come tonight! THANKS FOR THE KIND EMAILS!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:20 PM
Friday, May 9, 2008
Ashley with her game face on!
Some people on spring break do tequilla.... we do NUUN tablets!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 6:05 PM
Marit brought a French Press and actual coffee mugs, so I am in heaven. Waves and coffee!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 6:20 AM
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Posted by Mary Eggers at 7:52 PM
When I boarded the plane I missed the sign that said "WELCOME TO SIX FLAGS!" ..... holy camolie! Talk about ROUGH! Second flight I met Kathleen and John from Tennessee.... the three of us have tangoed around on all the same courses!
I am so happy right now and I need you all to know that! SO HAPPY! The only thing that could make this even better would be Curt and Luc.
Luc will blow bubbles into the air today and I will be here to catch them!!!
Much more to come!
Posted by Mary Eggers at 1:40 PM
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Hey Rachel..... you won't believe it, but my bike did not, did not, pack itself. I actually had to do it. I know.... I know..... I could not believe it either. We will have to cope by hitting Starbucks... unless you are off the juice again.....
I had a cool new suit for Gulf Coast. It had my Coach's company on it, black with yellow flowers.... gosh I love Splish! But I left it in the locker room this morning. UGH!!!!
Now I am forced to make a decision. I know, this is life altering to those of you who know me. Somehow I own 2 pink suits. I have nothing against pink. I am just not the girl who runs around in pink.
But just for kicks, just for giggles, just because I know Jen Harrison will somewhere scream and clap and be really proud, I am considering wearing a pink suit this weekend.
Will you be wandering around Saturday morning just wondering? Wondering???????
My husband told me flatly that the world likely does not care. Imagine that!
But the world might care about this...... Five girls, 2 beds, five bikes, and bathing suits. What happens in PCB stays in PCB! NOT!
Until the beach.......
Posted by Mary Eggers at 5:35 PM
Posted by Mary Eggers at 5:05 AM
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Posted by Mary Eggers at 4:49 AM
Monday, May 5, 2008
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:21 AM
Sunday, May 4, 2008
He grabbed my hand and squeezed it, smiled at me and kept going.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:20 AM
Saturday, May 3, 2008
And all of a sudden a rock breaks beneath your feet. You start to fall. You hit every single thing on the way down. Slice open your back, hit your head. Bang into boulders, get bruised, cut open and you bleed. You come to what you think is the bottom for a moment, but you realize it's just a ledge. Just when you think you hope this thing doesn't break it breaks, sending you rolling downward again. Your hands are grasping but you are grabbing twigs that break. You fall faster. You grab hold of a tree branch and you stop. You look up, you look down and while you know you are in the middle you are not sure which way is closer. Before you take your next breath that breaks too. You keep grabbing but you keep falling.
You hit the bottom and there is a lot of dust. Pain you have never felt. You are tired and you are bleeding. You look up. The sun somehow is still shining. It looks different from here. Through the rocks you can actually see sunbeams. You never saw that on the top. You notice the shape and the color of the rocks above you. You realize that the mountain is far more beautiful from the bottom.
And you can't believe you just survived the fall. You still have faith.
As you start to pick yourself up you are in a great deal of pain. There is a lot of blood, but you don't mind. You are muddy and dirty. You brush yourself off. It's what you've always done.
You take a deep breath in as you look up and wonder if you have the strength to do it again. As you reach for the first rock you are uncertain, but it holds you. You put your foot up on another, and it is solid. You begin to believe that you can do this.
Then the next rock you grab breaks. You begin to fall again and it's worse this time. You realize what you thought was the bottom, was not. There was another 250 feet to go.
Again you lay at the bottom. Rock bottom. As you look up you say that's too high. I can't do it again. You lose faith.
A group of climbers comes by and offers you assistance. No thanks you tell them…. I am fine, I can do it, and I need no help. The fear of someone knowing you are weak, sick, broken…… it overwhelming. You watch as they walk away together and begin to climb. Part of you wishes you went with them.
To not be alone right now …. you would do anything…. except admit you are weak.
So once again you pick yourself up. You walk to the bottom of the mountain. You see the group climbing, laughing, ascending, together. Your heart aches and the pain is so great. You want to have faith.
Finally, finally you decide to ask them for help. But they are far away and your pain is so great. You begin to climb anyways because you know if you just make it to them…… they will help you. You begin to look for faith.
You call out to them but your voice is weak. You don’t' want to really admit you need help. You know you have to. You try to shout. You are at war with yourself. Part of you is begging for help and the other part is angry that you would need it.
You scream louder. One of them hears you. They climb back down and they extend their hand. You reach up and you take it. Just by holding onto them your pain eases. Tears begin to flow and you try not to let them see you cry.
They pull you up to a ledge where they have water and food. They tell you they have been waiting for you. They tell you they have been climbing this mountain too, and they have been watching you fall and climb and fall. They tell you they have wanted to help you but …. you were stubborn. So they just waited.
As you sit down they give you water, they begin to clean your wounds. They put their arms around you and hold you tight.
At first you fight it, but then……. you stop. You allow the tears to come. You allow the love to come within you. You realize you are not alone. You never were alone and you never have to be alone.
You feel their love. You feel them hold you. They pick up your bags and you for once do not protest. Faith has found you.
When they say we will carry you, you let go of the fear. You relax into them and you allow them to carry you back up the mountain, You trust they won't let you fall. You trust that they will not let go. Every now and then the old fear arises that they will let go…… you pick up your head, you look at them, and they tell you to trust them, to relax. You go on faith.
Step by step and foot by foot they carry you to the top of that mountain. They remind you that you were never meant to do it alone. But because your life required you to survive……. they understood why you felt that way.
You look up to the sun, and while you are still weak, you are now healing. You feel the sunbeams wash over your body. Someone takes your hand, and again you begin to cry. You let it all out. But finally not crying because you are sad. You are crying because you let go. You let go of the stuff and you let in the love.
And you realized that love is what ultimately heals. That love is what erases pain. Takes away evil. Makes the world go around. You've been turned off of it for so long…… that you forgot that existed.
But you never will again.
Posted by Mary Eggers at 3:43 AM