The Dragon Slayer

"So... did you slay your dragon?" Elsa asked me, lighting her cigarette. In any other circumstance smoking a cigarette would annoy me, but not this time. Elsa had probably been smoking longer than I have been alive. Plus she sat downwind from me, as she pulled up a plastic chair on my beach front porch at the Quality Inn. We had met 2 days earlier, Elsa was a housekeeper there, and her name wasn't Elsa. She spoke with such a thick accent from the Dominican Republic, that I couldn't understand and was too embarrassed to ask her real name (again) So I named her Elsa. She had dark skin and dark hair sprinkled with grey. The lines on her forehead and around her eyes seemed to tell stories of harder days, yet happy ones too. I felt like she had a lot of history within her. A lot of experiences and a lot of wisdom.

I had been checking in and she recognized the bike box, asking me if I was here in Panama City for the big race. A woman likely in her forties, Elsa looked older and wiser than her supposed age.

"Yes," I replied to that first greeting, "I came down from upstate New York."

"Hoooo.... Hoooo." She waved her hands in front of her face. "What would bring you all the way here?"

"I came to slay a dragon" I smiled at her.

And so began a three day friendship with the only person I would really come to know in Panama City, yet one I knew I would never forget. She nicknamed me "Baby", likely because she forgot my name as well. She cleaned my room for me every day and left me extra coffee. At the end of her shift on that first day she came to stand on the porch, as the rooms on that side of the hotel were a literal 20 feet from the ocean.

"Would you like to sit down? In the shade?" I asked her, I knew she worked hard.

"Mind if I smoke?" she asked, "I sit downwind, I know you are an athlete." I complied and she sat downwind puffing on her Marlboro Red.

We began to talk about life, mine and hers. I learned about her youth and her travels to America. Her family, her one child who had died. I was fascinated to hear her stories, and she seemed equally fascinated by mine. I did however, feel like I had led the frivolous life of a princess compared to hers.

Elsa told me she had much experience with Ironman athletes. She left me cleaning rags for my bike, asked me if I needed anything additional, as she saw I was traveling alone.

So that first day in Panama City Beach matched the rest of the four days. Filled with warmth of people and sunshine. Filled with sand between my toes and relaxing happy moments.

Race day began for me at 0630 with a non eventful beach start. I was feeling good. My back pain had subsided and I was feeling happy. I found a good rhythm but as usual I found myself swimming alone in unpredictable waters. My new Blue Seventy Wetsuit felt warm, as the water was 76 degrees. But I was comfortable until I hit the turnaround and proceeded to get stung by about 14 jelly fish. Not at the same time.

Each time I reached my left hand out.... ZAP! Then my face, then my right hand. I lost count at 8 and in the process gained a new appreciation for one of my athletes. She has worked hard to overcome her fear of fish and open water and now here swimming in the land of jelly fish.... I can say ... I get it!

With a decent swim time I hopped out of the water and onto my bike. I was using the Ergomo to pace myself and after not too long found myself riding alone on long stretches of flat roads. The bike felt good, my cadence and wattage goals were being met. The 900 calories bottle of carbo pro was going down easy. Salt tablets were right on cue. I did have to stop for a moment to unscrew the lose C02 cartridges and stuff them into my suit, as one had fallen off. A woman passed me and I allowed it. I was ready for a powerful run today.

The past 2 weeks i have struggled with my back, but today everything felt lose and easy. I did feel a little lacking in speed. But I did not taper for this and have not done much speedwork, so I was expecting this.

My bike computer read 93 degrees at the end of the ride, and I felt I was prepared to run in the heat. I grabbed my Garmin in transition, and was off.

My first 2 miles felt wonderful, 7:30 pace. My form felt good, I felt relaxed and my back did not hurt. I was leading the age group.

Slowly the air began to thicken and I felt myself becoming very dizzy. Calculating my calories from the bike, 900. That should be plenty. I had taken a gel at the beginning of the run, that should be plenty. By the second mile things got foggy and I knew I was bonking. The first 2 aid stations were serving warm water and no ice. I didn't panic or become upset. After my second helping of warm water, I walked a bit. I knew I had to cool down and get out of this bonk. Today we were not going to the well. I promised myself that. This was an Ironman pacing test and while we were watching the clock, we were going to roll with the punches. It took me 10 minutes of walking and running to refuel myself. At that time I realized and accepted this would not be a PR day. I was okay with that. A woman I was running with suddenly fell to the ground. I helped her to the next aid station. It seemed people were dropping like flies.

By mile 5 I was out of the bonk, and I did switch my plan. I had the Garmin, I could map this pace. My question to myself then became...... can I run marathon pace and walk the aid stations? That would be about 45 seconds of walking per aid station which would then require me to run 8:15-8:30 miles. That would leave me enough room for a 4 hour Ironman marathon time.

Do I go to the well or do I test this out? I was already off my pace so I went for the test. I allowed myself to walk 45 seconds through each aid station loading up on the ice (finally) and the now cold beverages. I tried my water, and coke system. Ice in the hat, and ice in the suit. It took me no longer than 5 seconds to resume marathon pace again.

Damn! I thought, if today was Ironman Florida I would have NAILED it!

So I finished well, feeling too good. Good enough that I added 3 miles to the run to cool down. Way off 1/2 Ironman pace, 6th age group, but the Ironman pacing test had worked. I pulled out of a bonk and I felt really good despite this heat.

After my cool down run I walked down to the beach where I cooled off. A good day. I reveled in that. Not on paper, but the plan had worked. This was good news.

"Dude!" A guy gasped as he sat down next to me in the sand.... "What happened to your face and your freaking hand?"

I looked down. My left hand was fat. I could not even remove my wedding ring! I felt my face, it felt swollen. I panicked.

"I got stung by some jellyfish!" I told him, "But that was HOURS ago!"

"Girl we need to get you to the medical tent!!!" He grabbed my arm and led me to a tent overcrowded with people. I was taken in, an IV placed and given IV Benadryl. I was lectured on the dangers of being bitten by so many jellyfish. I argued that it was HOURS ago, but was scolded anyways.

And I had just texted my friends to tell them I managed to stay out of the medical tent. RATS!

I relayed my story to Elsa back at the hotel. By that time part of me was disappointed that I reverted to the Ironman pacing plan. But part of me felt like I did slay that dragon. I didn't get upset, puke, panic, and almost didn't end up in the medical tent.

"I think that you did slay the dragon." She told me. "But I think you placed the value of the dragon in the wrong place." I looked at her confused. "2 days ago you told me about your crippling fear of flying. You told me you turned down a trip to Hawaii because you were afraid to fly." Then she put down her cigarette and took both of my hands. "Sometimes the dragons we think we need to slay, are hiding behind one thing, but meaning something else. Now you are flying all over the country, and you came here alone. That is not a woman who is afraid to fly in an airplane. That is a woman who is finding herself and looking to see the world. You did it baby, you DID it."

Could she be right? Was the dragon not the race but a fear that I had conquered? I had to think about that one.

As always with these races however, I walk away learning so much about myself and what I love and who I am. I know now that victory does not always mean winning. There are lessons for me to learn and I am learning them. Slowly but I am.

One thing I did feel during this race was loneliness. I missed home. I missed racing at home.

And that's when it hit me. Why am I not racing at home? Why am I traveling all over the place? I have conquered this fear of flying.... maybe now it is time to come home for a while.

So I called my coach and we talked about it. I miss racing in my Score-This series. I miss seeing Rich, Bob, Bill and Jeff at the finish line. I miss the party that it is. I am..... I am homesick.

A plan revision was then in order. So I made some decisions. I need to continue to rehab my back. With the help of Dr. Les, and continuing my functional strength program, I will do that.

I need to work on my speed. So I am signing up for the Score-This series. A series I won for three years in a row. Racing more gives me great brick speed work.

I need just a little more time to prepare for Ironman. SO I have made the decision to not race Eagleman. That saves me a 2 week taper and 1 week recovery. That gives me 3 extra weeks to get ready.

That all felt great. That all sat well. Because you see I did slay the dragon. The crippling dragon of fear, that held me back from so many things. So many adventures and possibilities.

I am coming back to the basics. Coming back home. coming back to my roots. Because the stronger the base, the deeper the roots, the higher you can soar. And that made me smile.

I thanked Elsa as I left this morning. I told her I would be back. I left it open on whether I would do Ironman Florida or not. I will see how I feel after Lake Placid. But one way or another I am coming back here in November. With the boys this time. And regardless if it involves an Ironman we will be Beach bums for four days and not worry or care about anything but having a great time. And they shall meet Elsa. My new but old friend. The wisest woman in the world besides my Mom.

So I come home feeling excited. Excited about my day in Panama City. Excited to begin the final 8 week preparation for Lake Placid. And that preparation will involve teh Pittsford Triathlon, Keuka Lake, A Tri In the Buff and the Mini Mussel.

Because guess what friends...... what I realized most of all this weekend is that famous old saying.....

There is no place like home.

Thank you for stopping by.

:-) Mary Eggers