Wednesday, August 26, 2009

amazement

I know that my morning lake swims are coming to a close, just like the 5am bike rides on the roads. The sun is up later and setting earlier, and while I absolutely love the change of season and scenery that the four seasons brings.... I am not ready.

Next week I begin graduate school, a three year journey to my Master's degree (I will be a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner). On one hand it feels like it will be forever, on the other hand, it's all in balance. I cut a little bit from everything that I do and classes are part time. When you begin a program like this you are often told of it's difficulty and how you won't have time for triathlon, or this, or that.

That's never been true for me, nor will it ever be.

There's never a time where my life will only be one thing. I find the balance, I find time for the outlet that triathlon gives me. I do a lot of my studying on the bike trainer. I tape lectures and listen to them again while riding or running.

I believe that as long as you keep things in balance there is time for everything.

I am excited about this journey, it comes at a good time in my life.

Summer coming to a close means Luc begins school in 2 weeks. He is doing really well. As you might remember I had pulled him out of his former in the spring for 10 weeks and he began a new school in May. He attended all summer long and loved it. He got himself up, dressed and on the bus each morning. He couldn't wait to get there. He's made friends, he talks to his friends on the phone. I don't have a whole new kid..... I have a kid who is in the right place and in the right hands. As a mother it's my job .... as right now he's just 8..... to protect him and the situations he is in. He's been in so many difficult situations and around people who just don't understand him..... who claim it's a "behavioral issue"...... and now we've got him in a place that understands truly who he is.

We've been seeing an amazing specialist over the summer, and we had the most amazing visit yesterday. Three times he stood up and gave Luc a standing ovation for his work and his progress over the summer. With tears in my eyes I listened to the doctor read me his dictation from his last visit...... he was comparing it to this current visit and the progress was unbelievable.

I have been learning a lot from this specialist. What I like is that he's a teacher and he's a good teacher. I learned that it is common for children on the spectrum to love roller coasters and scary movies, two things which Luc himself loves.

Scary movies and roller coasters allow kids to explore the edges of their imagination, it's a safe place for them to do so. This allows them to play that edge and build resiliency.

Wow. That's neat.

Perhaps it's the same thing that we do in our sport. We get to play our edges a bit. We set goals that might frighten us and then we take small steps to achieve and overcome and get to that goal. We build our own resiliency in an environment that is safe to do so. We become stronger because we keep placing ourselves in situations where we have to be. We step outside of our box of safety and make that reach knowing full well there will be critics and there will be naysayers..... there are always more of those than there are people who will support and believe in you.

In fact I know there are people who are watching my journey with Jesse and QT2 who are in my sport..... and doubt me.

I will never..... ever...... ever listen to them. The only one I will ever listen to is me. To my heart. To my dreams.

Which is why I forge ahead unafraid. To grad school, in growing my business, to challenging my husband to a head to head Ironman battle. I don't believe I can..... I know I can. While I am not a great big fan of roller coasters this allows me to play on the edges of my imagination. To get out there and get a little dirty, be a little vulnerable, dare myself to fail and dare myself to succeed.

Why don't you?

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Thanks so much for your blog! My son has recently been diagnosed with Aspergers, and my husband and I have been struggling with dealing with him and the situation. Look for a blog post soon! Thanks, Mary, and good luck with grad school.

Anonymous said...

Thanks. I'm working on my 2nd bachelor's degree, training for a marathon, working 6 days a week 11 hours a day, and trying to be a good mom to my kiddos. I've been feeling a little over-booked. Thanks for reminding me that I wouldn't change anything about my life.

Laura said...

Mary, thanks for being you and sharing these things with us! :)